Watching My Trans Wife at the 2019 Hollywood Fringe Festival made me think of a passage from the Song of Solomon: “Many waters cannot quench love, neither can floods drown it.” Mimi Kmet and Mara Wells are a testament to the truth of that adage. Kmet, who identifies as a straight ciswoman, was raised as a good Catholic girl. Mara, a transwoman, spent most of her life as a male. As unlikely a couple as one could imagine, they not only fell in love but got married—and have now collaborated on a performance piece about, as they put it, “our life in a parallel universe.” Although neither Mimi nor Mara are professional actors, they handle themselves well on stage, telling their remarkable story in a crisp, well-modulated manner. Sometimes speaking in unison, sometimes separately, they address the audience directly, making for a strong, personal connection. That they both have a lively sense of humor is another plus, as it helps lighten the many dark moments in their passage through life. Mimi, for example, was rejected by her traditional Catholic family when she took up with Mara, who was merely a cross-dresser in the early years of their relationship. She also suffered from the guilt of having left the Church and defied its precepts. Things were worse for Mara when he was growing up, a female trapped in a male body. Names like “sissy” and “queer” were hurled at him; for years he tried to hide his true nature from the world and live as a man. Eventually, though, he decided to “leave the boy’s club” and live a more authentic and fulfilling life. That meant dressing fulltime as a woman, something Mimi was remarkably willing to accept (even though, as she made clear, she was not a lesbian). More complications arose when Mara, over time, decided that she needed to transition to full womanhood. That meant taking hormones and other drugs, and, finally, having the five-hour operation that would complete the physical change. Still, Mimi hung in there with her, if only because her love remained constant. It wasn’t all hearts and flowers, though. In the course of transitioning, Mara began to have her own guilty and even suicidal feelings. She came close to killing herself, an act that she talks about frankly and movingly. Today Mimi and Mara are still happily married. The former is a journalist and producer; the latter an architect and a world-class harmonica player (who shows off her prowess on the instrument at key moments during the performance). Aided by video projection and, especially, by Deborah Pearl’s deft, skilled direction, My Trans Wife tells a love story like no other.
